Today started out rough.... didn't get much sleep, forgot to put the basket in the coffee maker (coffee everywhere), and a cranky little boy who didn't sleep much either last night. Maybe it's from all the excitement over the last couple weeks and being off our usual routine, but today was tough with my son. He was overly clingy and whiny and didn't want to eat or do anything we wanted him to do. Oh well....
I'm started to become a little anxious again about our financial situation, it's going to be a really tough next 45 days. Hubby's financial aid from school rolls in around late-February, but before then, it's a long, dark, scary road. Thankfully, the Lord is with us and I know He will continue to provide for us. We are in desperate need of a MAJOR financial breakthrough....this has been 2 (almost 2 1/2) long years of struggling so badly. I'm trying not to worry and I find myself daily giving my anxiety over to the Lord about these struggles. It is so easy to worry because you want to have answers, but the Lord wants us to cast our cares upon Him... It's the only choice I have since I have no answers at all and neither does my hubby.... we feel like each day is just a blur and we feel as though we are going nowhere... we're arguing more, irritated more, and sad more. Times are tough, but again, we continue to thank the LORD for all HIS provision to us. He has been so faithful to us even in the midst of the worst financial melt down we've experienced. He is faithful and will continue to be faithful. I know that the Lord knows all our bills that are overdue and all of our families monetary needs. I continue to cry out day and night asking for the Lord to intervene in our family. We have been so blessed by many miracles this year that have gotten us through really tough times. We are humbled by the Lord's grace and provision in our lives. Our heart is to give back, to give to others in need, to help those who are hurting. We know how tough it is and how hard it is to not have enough and the struggles that it causes. We want to reach out to those who are hurting....we want to bless others and give to those struggling. We want to be in that place where someone can come to us for help.... Lord this is our heart! We know what it is like and we want to help others.
As the New Year approaches, I am thinking of many things I would like to see differently.... getting in shape (always a new years resolution), but not just getting in shape....but getting HEALTHY. Another goal is to streamline my time and not say yes to everything. I don't want to alway be "busy" doing things. Instead I want to do what the Lord wants me to do with my time. I'm so happy to be getting plugged into our church and seeing the great ministries and opportunities that they make available. Hubby and I are finally feeling at home with our church and we are so happy to be attending there. Sweet J loves the Sunday school and is always asking to go to church.
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